Real Housewives NYC is back baby!!! And movies ... and Olympics ..

Oh my god! It's back!!!!

ok ok .. gotta dust off my nicknames:

Duhmona ... wow, what a piece of work. I mean, it's nice that she'll defend mario to the death, but she made it all about her. She should have first of all told IAMSTILLACOUNTESSDAMMIT, that while she understands how upsetting what mario said was, that she wanted to focus on having fun with friends and that they can clear the air in private off the boat. She's such a little child. But it's interesting, I think she has always been a child because of this supposed horribly abusive father she had ... I thought she always focused on how horrible her mother was, now it's daddy's turn now that he's dead (CLASSSSSSAYYYYYY). So anyway, it's obvious that Duhmona has never progressed beyond her childhood and now that howible mommy and daddy are no longer awound, she can finally GROW THE EFF UP ... poor Avery.

IAMSTILLACOUNTESSDAMMIT ... little miss (truly MISS now!) just can't keep up. She's been locked away in her purchased title for all these years and now she's trying to get out in the world amongst the proletariat. If I have to hear the preview of her catterwalling one more time, I may have to puke. She sounds worse than that blond dimwit from Atlanta! Hey, there's a thought, they could do an album together and they can play it as a replacement for torturing terrorist suspects!

Bethandthecity ... awww, she's in LOOOOVE!!!! Oh but that supposed clever wit of hers, man, how can Jason (wasn't that the name of the bald guy from season 1?) take it? And enough of the skinny girl advertising! Seriously! She cannot be making any money because every cent has to be turned around and put on some trinket or tchotchke or CAR ... blech. Bethandthecity, with this "fame" has just turned her already mile wide suit of armor of denial even thicker. She's a lost soul on the same emotional wavelength as Duhmona, only Duhmona doesn't push it away.

Alex .. NO SIMON!

Kelly ... awwww poor Kelly. Yea right. She's still a halfwitted narcissistic dork. And don't you love how IAMACOUNTESSDAMMIT just doesn't want to hear or relate to anyone who has been through a divorce ... MYMARRIAGEOF16YEARS darling ... phooey! Ok Countess, keep playing that card and it's going to flip right back into your face and it's gonna hurt!

And finally ... yenta Jill. You know, she has the best husband on the show and she cannot even appreciate it. She loves sticking her nose into other people's misery to make herself feel better. She can't do that with Bawbby because he's a self sufficient man who is very cool. And now that Bethandthecity has found some happiness, she doesn't need to be bubby'd to death ... Bethandthecity isn't crying anymore over the void and she doesn't need a yenta to feed her soup and pat her head and say "it's gonna be ok" and unfortunately, Yenta Jill doesn't know how to be a friend who just listens and supports and has fun, she must meddle to make herself feel useful. Now, Bethandthecity telling her that she needs a hobby ... kinda not cool ... but in essence is right on. And yenta jill is now going to go superyenta and throw that into her face and in every conversation she can, which is really stupid. Hey jill ... Bethandthecity has moved on ... accept and support her or let her go!!!! I think that Jill needs major therapy to deal with her abandonment issues.

Watched some Stephen Rea movies, ones where he doesn't have the Irish accent. The first was a tv movie, Citizen X, based on the capture of the Ukrainian serial killer, Andrei Chikatilo. Since it was a tv movie, the blood and gore were minimal. The story was better than the acting. It's an incredible story that has as much to do with the BS that was the USSR as much as it did with the actual serial killings. You can surmise that the regime actually kept that whacko on the streets for as long as he was killing. The killings started in 1978 and continued until 1990. Ironic how he was finally apprehended so soon after the USSR collapsed. Anyway, Rea and Donald Sutherland's russian accents are pretty bad, but I guess given the storyline, I'll be ok because it really is a great movie.

The other Stephen Rea movie is called Stuck. I read the synopsis on the channel guide and it said a man gets stuck in a windshield ... hmm, ok ... how seriously should I take that? But it's true! Rea plays this homeless guy who gets run over by Mena Suvari's character and he is literally stuck in her windshield for a good portion of the movie. Now, I'm not terribly queasy, but this film was way over the top on the blood, gore, bones sticking out ... pulling windshield wipers out of yer guts action ... so gross! So I watched it and .. ok, it was good and then I find out it was based on a true story. Yes, it says so in the beginning, but so does Fargo. But this incident apparently did happen in Dallas a few years ago. Rea has this rather strange American accent. Again, not good, but the movie is still good.

Olympics are over .... I have to say, gotta give it up to the Canadian hockey teams. Thumbs up Canucks! The closing ceremonies were freaking weird! It looks like it was thrown together after having too many Molsons and bagels. One of the most hyped new post olympics shows was Parenthood ... STUNK! Couldn't even get through 15 minutes of it. Blech. Had high hopes for it too because I tend to like Peter krause and Lauren Graham. They even have the little kid from Daddy Daycare who ruins eddie murphy's bathroom ... growing up, but still the same face and hair. When Peter Krause's character left his house and started jogging ... I groaned ... gee, that's right out of Six Feet Under! Dumb dumb dumb ... dumb.

it's melting, it's melting!

As the snow withers away, and my internal sleep schedule continually wakes me up at 3:30 on the nose ... ugh ... I'm watching lots of Olympics! I love that NBC has Olympics on at least one channel 24/7 ... but I'm also watching other things too.

Watched Judgement at Nuremburg .. in HD, btw ... and it was SPECTACULAR. What a film ...
what
a
film

the politics abounding in the film aside. One can debate those forever, but the performances. Seriously ... Montgomery Clift .. sigh ... just love him and I wish he could get the recognition he so deeply deserves. Judy Garland ... wow, best performance of her career ... Tracy .. Dietrich ... Schell ... Widmark ... Lancaster .. shoot, even William Shatner!!!! It's an intense 3+ hour film and it is timeless. I guess I'd have to say that my favorite performance was by Clift, but I'm biased too. You can tell how sick he is, in real life. It was one of his last films. I have to wonder if Tarantino challed Stanley Kramer when he was writing Inglorious Basterds.

I've been watching the show The Middle and I have a big issue with it.

Ok, it's really really funny, well written and the kids are the reason to watch the show. The Dad is played by the janitor from scrubs and he's about 10 feet tall and the wife is played by the wife from Everyone Loves Raymond and she's about 3 feet tall, so that's funny right there. The kids are all nuts. Oldest son runs around in boxer shorts, middle daughter is a loveable loser and the youngest, named for a building product, is strange, but in a good way. The storylines are always funny, the acting is good. But here's the issue ... this series is supposed to take place in southern Indiana. The dad works in a quarry, the mom sells cars. They are also several generational residents of this small southern indiana town. The parents have WisCANsin accents! Nobody has any hint of a ketuckiana drawl that most native southern indiana folks have. Oh wait .. there was one character who had a ketuckiana drawl ... a guest character played by Brooke Shields, who was a ... skanky, to say the least, white trash, probably drunk and drug addled neighbor who's equally gross boys terrorize the neighbors .. who are also winCANsin accented. No, the white trash lady has a wonderful southern drawl!!!! Really???? That's just really demeaning to those of us who live in southern indiana ... accented or not. I don't know if there are any writers from indiana on this show. I'm going to hope not because if there are ... shame on them for depicting southern indiana people is such a derogatory (Brooke Shields) and unrealistic (the family and neighbors) way.

snow snow snow

Well it looks like we are getting our annual mega dump of snow ...

poor birds:

At least I have the Olympics to keep me warm. Ahhhhhhh, I'm so glad that I only have to wait for 2 years to get my Olympics fix. Found myself jumping up and down cheering for ... the nordic combined? And just think, Curling doesn't start until tomorrow!!!

I've been watching the latest Erroll Morris documentary called Standard Operating Procedure. I'm about halfway through it and it's hard to watch. Here, for your viewing pleasure, are most every picture from Abu Ghraib and it's just gross. Morris managed to collect most everyone involved in the picture taking too ... Lindie England being the most telling. Listening to her retell the story of how she got involved with that sick b-word, Charles Grainer ... wow ... that guy should stay in jail. and what's up with all the thumbs up pictures? I don't know. Several of the soldiers involved as well as at least 1 army intelligence guy was interviewed (he was dishonorably discharged) and Janice Karpinski, who was the person in charge of the jails in Iraq sounds just as flummoxed by the entire ordeal now, as she did when it happened. What I like about Morris films, unlike the bang you over the head nature of michael moore films, is that he passes no judgements. You feel both sympathy and pure contempt for Lyndie England. I feel like she's just not that bright and did get railroaded into making really bad choices. Again, she's not that bright. I'll have to report back on the second half.

Nip/Tuck is winding down, with a wimper ... Kimber is dead ... maybe. They haven't found her body anyway. Sean and Christian's characters are going through the motions ... I'm sure they just want it all to be over too. I'm sticking around to see if there's any big whoop dee doo series finale.

I'm back to watching Damages. I didn't watch season 2 ... can't remember why ... was it because it was too dark? I don't know. I'm sticking around because of the 2 comedians who are taking dramatic turns and are quite impressive. Lilly Tomlin is playing the spouse of a Bernie Madoff character and Martin Short is their defense attorney. It's really cool. The character of Ellen is so BORING!!! Seriously, she's never happy ... always dour, blah blah blah. Glen Close looks like she's having almost too much fun with Patty Hewes' character. Boy, who knew one bad girl character would typecast her! What happened to the sweet mother from World According to Garp???

Watched a movie called the Break with Stephen Rea and Alfred Molina .. meh.

Started watching The Middle. A friend recommended it and it's pretty good, not great. It's the lead in for Modern Family, which is the best sitcom on tv. The Middle is supposed to take place somewhere in southern Indiana. The husband works at a quarry ... no quarries north of Indianapolis, so that's why I'm guessing southern Indiana and they talk about going to French Lick. It's pretty good, but it's not really believeable ... again ... I'm living in southern indiana right now and I'm sorry, if this family is a multi-generational southern indiana family ... husband works in a quarry ... that entire family would have kentuckiana accents and the sure as heck don't. I'm not entirely thrilled with the mom and dad ... they're kind of boring actually. The kids who play their kids are worth watching the show, as is Chris Kataan. Wow, Saturday Night Live didn't do Kataan justice. He's so much better now. I'm glad that I watched his turn in Bollywood Hero, because he was really funny in that. He would make a fantastic Charlie Chaplin.

Modern Family and 30 Rock are chugging along. I love Modern Family. Cameron has to be my favorite character. So loveable and sweet. Jay is next ... Ed O'Neil is a great actor and it makes me happy that he's left Al Bundy in the dust. He's so much better now. Hopefully many many awards will be coming it's way. 30 Rock is reaching institutional status. Still not a big fan of Tina Fey ... she tries too hard at being pathetic. It's incredibly obvious that she grew up privileged and was a mean girl and uses her role as Liz Lemon as a mea culpa. I watch the show for every character except Jenna and Liz ... everyone else is hysterically funny. Tina Fey just rubs me the wrong way.

ok, one more snow picture for the road:

In praise of Haiku Tunnel

about 8 years ago, I had an infant daughter who, like most infants in general, would wake up in the middle of the night because they are hungry. So, being the dutiful mommy, I would go downstairs get a bottle ready sit on the couch, feed the baby and end up dozing off just as the baby dozes off during the bottle.

Fortunately, we had a plethora of movies to choose from on cable during these feedings. One night, I flipped onto a movie called Haiku Tunnel. It's about a guy, Josh, and his misadventures as a law firm temp. While I was never a law firm temp, I was a law firm support staffer and this movie hits every single nuance of what it's like to work in a law firm as a support staffer. Weird partners, especially of the tax variety, spooky office managers, squawky secretaries and the best .. SUMMER ASSOCIATES!!! Oh my gosh, Josh completely nails summer associates and they way they are ... I still laugh just thinking about it.

Well anyway, 8 years later, my tivo picked it up and I watched it and guess what ... 8 years later, it's still freaking hilarious!!!!

So Josh Kornbluth, I dedicate this posting to you!

2 movies last night

I'll get the crappy one out of the way first ... ugh.

The Darwin Awards. What and why????? I picked it up because i want to watch movies with Tim Blake Nelson (o brother where art thou and Wonderland ... actually liked him better in Wonderland). This had to be one of those movies that everyone knew was going to stink, but did it because it would be a couple days work, in and out. The cast ... joseph Fiennes, Winona Ryder, nelson, David Arquette, Josh Charles, Juliette lewis, Chris penn (had to be his last film) ... it also has a neat cameo by the mythbusters guys, of which, I'm sure the film pulled inspiration from. Fiennes plays the disgraced detective who starts working as an insurance fraud investigator ... it was stupid beyond stupid. There was one snippet involving metallica that was pretty cool, but Fiennes and Ryder ... blech ... Tim Blake nelson was ok too. But wow, this movie was really really bad.

I know i listed my favorite movies in the previous post, but I watched one last night that may sneak in. Our local paper had a movie decade in review type thing and on the list was a film called The Lives of Others. German film, won best foreign film at the Oscars in 2006 ... dealing with Stasi spying during the GDR period. Thought I'd have a look, tivo'd it and .... wow. it's a long film ... it's German! And yes, it details how the secret police spied on perceived enemies for, this one in particular, a very selfish reason. There are very few films where I cry because of a happy ending ... well, not happy in the traditional sense, there was tragedy behind the ending, but still .. I was starting to get ticked because I was afraid the ending was going to be with the artist seeing his spy, after the wall fell down walking down the street and never confronting him ... that's what i expected, but no ... that wasn't the end and the ending was PERFECT. Serioulsy, a perfect ending to a film. That's rare. The best scene, other than the final one was when the workers got word that the wall came down and the GDR was no more ... it was incredibly low key (German film!) and completely appropriate and efficient (German film!).

Yea, it's on my list. This film is simply perfect.

My Favorite Films ....

don't know if I've ever listed them. I won't rank them except for my favorite film of all time. until a film effects ... or affects me like The Bicycle Thief did ... it's still number one.

Ok The Bicycle Thief ... contextually, it's a perfect film. The story is so simple, but the feel, the feel of post-war Italy ... they lost the war too you know and they suffered as well as a result. The ending, so sparse, so final, so heartbreaking ...

and in no particular order:

Che ... my most recent addition. So congratulations Soderberg, you did it. You completely made me have faith that you are able to make great films. Ze Good German was very good and I'll say that watching that one gave me a glimmer of hope, but Che hit it out of the ballpark. Of course, it was IGNORED by the American cinema going public, which is a damn shame. Even the glaring skipping over of Che's time in the Belgian Congo ... Che is a masterpiece of biographical cinema and should be watched by every student of history and film.

Pan's Labyrinth ... a historical setting ... Franco's rise in Spain. A little girl with a very active imagination .. she needed one. The scariest monster ever on film, the pale man. Just a magnificent piece of art ...

Unbearable Lightness of Being ... it's personal for me. First, my mom is Czech. Second, i watched this a day after i came home from the Soviet Union. The gray/green atmosphere of the Soviet era cut me to the core and I wept for half of the film because it took me back to how i felt and the smells of the Soviet union.

Donnie Darko. Richard Kelly has yet to write and direct anything comparable. Incredibly original screenplay and concept of the world coming to an end. Great soundtrack and who knew that Patrick Swayze had acting skills! It's Jake Gyllenhall's best work as well. I can watch this film over and over again and it will marinate in my head for a week. it's a shame that so far Richard kelly seems to be a one trick pony because his second effort, Southland Tales was one of the WORST films I've ever seen.

These next two are grouped together because for the life of me, I cannot pick out my favorite:

Anything Coen Brothers. Still waiting to see The Serious Man, but I'm sure it will go into my "classic" file. The only 2 Coen films that I say "meh" to are Hudsucker Proxy and Burn After Reading and I really can't understand why they bothered with Intolerable Cruelty. I know I shouldn't feel that way toward Hudsucker, but I do ... I'm not a big Tim Robbins fan and I'm REALLY not a big Jennifer Jason Leigh fan ... ugh, she's just so annoying to watch. For her, it's about putting on some fake voice, felt the same way about Mrs. parker and the Vicious Circle, but anyway. Wish they could do a do over on that one, but there was no saving Burn After Reading. Hoping that they can come up with something that is Brad Pitt worthy. The first Coen Brothers movie I saw was Raising Arizona when I was in college and I was blown away by the sheer originality of it. Only the Coen Brothers can make kidnapping a baby funny. The Man Who Wasn't There, I would have to say, is my favorite. But it may be eclipsed when I see Serious Man. I even enjoyed their remake of Ladykillers, despite Tom Hanks dumb performance ... everyone else made it acceptable. Fargo didn't win enough Oscars. That's one I can sit and watch and shiver. just like when I watch No Country for Old Men .. it makes me sweat.

Barton Fink
Lebowski
Blood Simple
Miller's Crossing
O Brother Where Art Thou

my goodness, these 2 guys are amazing, can't say enough.

Anything Quentin Tarantino. I adore every single on of his films and it would make me happy if he would take his script for Natural Born Killers and have a re-do because then every QT script would be a masterpiece, burn in hell oliver stone, ya putz. I saw Reservoir Dogs when I was working in Chicago and all these gearhead U of Chicago law students were talking about it, so I checked it out and just went "gawwwwwww". QT is a master of the tribute film, but he does it so well that the audience doesn't realize it. I saw Pulp Fiction on opening night ... even used the new fangled service of buying tickets over the phone with my credit card just to guarantee I would have a seat. I went into the movie a little tired and came out so jonsed up that I stay awake most of the night. I still watch it and am amazed how the film fits together like a masterpiece by Mozart, even though the story jumps around. Tarantino revived the careers of Travolta, Keitel, Grier and made major movie stars out of Sam Jackson and Uma Thurman. And Inglorious Basterds ... wow ... QT won the Oscar for his Pulp screenplay, but he should take it all home ... I'm talking best picture here ... for Basterds. I wish more people would appreciate he and Robert Rodriguez's tribute to Grindhouse features because Death Proof was totally awesome. I also can't wait to see the third volume of Kill Bill, coming in 2014!!!!

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford ... the name of the film killed it. But it's just an amazing piece of cinematic art. Each performance is beautifully muted. Brad Pitt is frightening as Jesse James and he deserved at least an Oscar nomination. Casey Affleck got it instead, which was ok since the entire film was incredible. Roger Deakins cinematography work in this film was a sight to behold. Seriously, I took one scene and paused it frame by frame and each frame looked like a portrait from the period. It's no wonder the Coen Brothers work with him exclusively.

Animal Crackers ... yea, Animal Crackers. Comedy is about timing and this one is a masterpiece of timing. Groucho Marx's monologues, Chico and Harpo's slapstick ... timing timing timing and funny funny funny. There's a plot somewhere in this film, but I just watch it for those 3 going from one bit to another. Charlie Chaplin was also a master of comedic timing, but the marx brothers had to time time it 3 ways. Now I won't discount Chaplin because i adore his work as well and if anyone can get through the chase scene from The Kid without crying their eyes out, well, there's something wrong.

The Matrix. The first one. Again, this is a movie where what was presented was so new and cutting edge and freaking cool! I remember walking out of that film thinking "oh my god, I get it now" ... seriously, I thought the matrix was for real. James Cameron and his blue people can stuff it. The Wachowski Brothers, even the one who is a woman now can do better than Cameron and could probably whoop his butt. The other 2 installments weren't good at all ... which is too bad. This is why i specifically only list the first one.

The Blues Brothers ... ok ok ... it's not THAT good of a film, but it's just fun. Great Chicago picture. I can watch it over and over again and still laugh and recite every line from the Mall scene. As far as Chicago pictures go ... Blues Brothers, Ferris Bueller, Adventures in Babysitting ... all choice. But The Blues Brothers really put Chicago on the film map.

Marty Movies, that's what I call films by Scorcese. Goodfellas didn't win enough Oscars, neither did Raging Bull. Those are my 2 favorite Marty Movies. I watched The Age of Innocence a couple years ago and was amazed by the beauty of it, not necessarily by the performances. I'm convinced that marty's oscar for Departed was a makeup for his snubbing in previous years, especially for Raging Bull. I'm not quite sure what his deal is with DiCaprio right now ... seems like every marty movie has leo in it anymore.

Empire of the Sun. Spielberg's best film, period, but it doesn't get the love it deserves. Schindler's List ... blech ... stupid, manipulative and false. Christian Bale didn't get the recognition he deserved for taking on such a massive role at such a young age. The story is rich and incredibly well executed from start to finish. The final scene makes me sigh in relief everytime I see it. You want so badly for his mom and dad to see him. I think I may have actually shouted "There he is!!!!!!" at the screen when I saw it for the first time.

The Pianist ... Roman Polanski's masterpiece, hate him all you want for what he did with that 13 year old girl, but this film simply is the best Holocaust picture ever made and again, like him or not, Roman Polanski deserved that best director Oscar (given to him by Harrison Ford) and Adrien Brody deserves the best actor Oscar for the next 10 years for his performance. This is one of the few films where I wept from start to finish ... didn't weep a bit watching Schindler's List ... didn't deserve my tears.

And as long as I'm riffing on Schindler's List ... I'll tell you, I almost gave up on Spielberg after that stupid movie. He redeemed himself when he made Munich. This film was excellent and unlike Schindler, didn't manipulate the audience at all. i'll keep watching Spielberg films because of Munich.

No Man's Land ... a film about the war in Yugoslavia and how confusing, even for those who are fighting each other, that war became. it also manages to squeeze a few chuckles out of the audience when they introduce the media into the mix. 3 guys in a trench. 2 from one side, one from the other and one of them is laying on a landmine ... it's a trip. There aren't enough films made about this incredibly sad time in history. But then again, it may be too soon. Another good film about the war in yugoslavia was called Welcome To Sarajevo by Michael Winterbottom. Very very good and again, the media is a major character in the film.

ok ... that's all I can think of for now ... maybe i'll add more as time goes on.

revolutionary road ... so disappointing

Watched Revolutionary Road. i guess i expected more. I'll say this, I liked it better than Rachel Getting Married, which doesn't take much!

I cannot reconcile Leonardo DeCaprio as a leading man. he's a good actor, no doubt. But he has the face of a 10 year old boy. What show was he on .. Growing Pains? yea, he still looks like that only with his head planted on a man's body. And i'm going to spoil the movie during this drubbing, so if you don't want to find out what happens at the end, stop reading ...



now.




kate winslet's character was horrible, just horrible and when she died at the end of the film, I acutally clapped. DeCaprio's character was better off without her pathetic self centered immature butt. I WANNA MOVE TO PARRRRRRRRRRRRRRISSSSSSSSSSSS ... ugh ... what a stupid stupid stupid storyline. I read that this was such a tragic tale ... no .. it was stupid. I really rolled my eyes when Winslet took the kids out into the yard to tell them that ... booo hoooooo ... they weren't moving to Paris and the kids STOMPED OFF . Bullshit ... sorry, but that was bullshit. Those kids would be THRILLED to not have to leave all their friends, their house, everything they know ... in fact, their kids were 10x more mature than winslet's pathetic character. Now, the one part of the film that was relevant was the overarching theme of a woman's right to choose. Her character gave herself an abortion and died as a result. That was the reality back in the 50's ... women had no choice and we'll never know how many women died like she did. But still the movie SUCKED!!!!!!! Why Roger Deakins lent his amazing talents to this movie, i'll never know.

So Transsiberian turned out to be the best movie of all the ones I watched over the holiday.

I started out the new year by watching Inglorious Basterds (again, spoilers below). First, I think I jumped up from my seat and jumped up and down for joy at least twice and then when the film was finished, my hand were aching from clapping so loud. Basically, i was like a child who has just been given the key's to santa's workshop. I'm still marinating on whether or not this was QT's best ... it may very well be when all is said and done, but as of now, Pulp Fiction is still my favorite ... i did manage to watch the final hour of it while flipping channels the other night ... Don't Jimmy me Jules ... and Ving Rhames cool send off to Bruce Willis in the dungeon ... man, I'll always find something to rave about in that movie.

Basterds. Ok .. my prediction. It will be nominated for the following Oscars:

Best Picture
Best Screenplay
Best actor -the guy who plays Landa
Best Director

Brad Pitt SHOULD get a best supporting nod, but he'll be snubbed as usual. he easily delivered some of the best lines ever spoken.

over half the movie is subtitled and I be darned if that's not Steve Buscemi on the stairs in a nazi uniform during the Operation kino scene ... i swear it is! And I also dig Sam jackson as the narrator and keitel as Pitt's superior officer ... voice only. Damn, i watch too many QT films. And yes, when Shoshanna died, she did the exact same fall and death face as Uma did in Kill Bill. Geek ... yes, I am!

That film was simply the BEST revenge fantasy film ever! i need to watch it again.