Total Breakdown ... very sad to watch

I usually really riff on these ladies, but last night's episode ... wow. I can't even say that KellyHIEEE is a mess ... I can't say that she's batcrap crazy. She's seriously unstable. She has such deep seeded issues and I think they are all due to the breakup of her marriage. Something tells me that she actually thought that guy would stay with her forever and she is still not over the fact that he left and has moved on a couple more times. I think she's ashamed that her marriage failed and that she is a single mom. She is terribly paranoid and I wonder what happened with her daughter because she seemed very stressed out by the conversation she had with her daughter and it was all downhill from there. I have a feeling that Gilles Bensimon has nothing to do with their children and that makes KellyHIEEEE really depressed. This would explain why she doesn't like emotions, she doesn't like to talk about the past. But at the same time, she acts like the little schoolgirl that Giles Bensimon married and thought she would be with forever.

What we saw was a total breakdown and it wasn't funny anymore. This was beyond Bethandthecity being mean. I think that KellyHIEEE sees Bethandthecity as the person she wishes she could be. Outwardly confident and successful on her own terms, expecting a new baby and is engaged. After KellyHIEEE got burned last summer, she's completely lost because she probably feels like her womanly mojo has been zapped.

I hate to say it, but I kinda feel sorry for her.

And onto the snarkfest!

OK, WTF is it with Bethandthecity ... seriously? She can't come up with a personalized gift other than a big fat tax deductible Skinnygirl bag? Really? I would have been hacked .. I mean, come on dude! This is a girl's getaway, not a stinking food convention! Bet she has those same bags at food conventions! Seriously ...

Fangface really held her own. It was uncomfortable watching the photoshoot though. It was obvious that Fangface wasn't comfy with a camera in her face. Why couldn't a nice posed beach shot do? Duhmona and Sexpot were getting jiggy with it though ... and what the heck is it with Duhmona's obession with her own a$$? Ok, girlfriend, you're 50-ish, with a smokin' bod, but please, hunny bunny ... you are your biggest fan it's pretty obnoxious!

Sexpot Sonja was excellent. She is the grande dame of the group! I think that Fangface just wants to hide in a sand dune, but Sexpot is willing to try to diffuse the situation. Fangface is over it.

And Yenta Jill ... just can't stop being a Yenta. Oy! Next week looks to be hysterical! She is just not the brightest bulb in the bunch. I hope Duhmona goes postal on her.

Ok, I'm gonna ZIP it now!

When You're Strange

Wow .... this is one of the best documentaries I've seen in a long time. American Experience on PBS does it again. Johnny Depp narrated this excellent documentary on the Doors. What these 4 guys did in 5 or so years is stinking amazing! All those songs. Yea, I know they had a lot of great songs, but man, they had a lot of great songs! Jim Morrison ... what can I say that hasn't been said. The man was meant to be a rock star. The show had this dead ringer for Jim Morrison, it was pretty scary.

I've also watched bits and pieces of a few movies over the past few days.

Zack and Miri make a porno. What is it with Kevin Smith movies? I like them for the most part, but Kevin Smith seems to want to make films only to push the limits. He has an affinity for feces, which is funny ... I dig a good poop joke as much as the next person, but this porno movie really took it too far. Loved Tracey Lords in the movie. She was funny.

I forgot that George Clooney was in From Dusk Till Dawn ... what's wrong with me?

and on the OMFG I want my 2 hours back ... The Proposal ... argh!!!! I'll go ahead and say that I cannot believe why in the world she won an Oscar for the Blind Side ... ok, I haven't seen it, but I have a feeling that the scenes they show over and over and over and over are pretty much it. She plays some rich woman with a badass attitude ... big whoop. So this proposal movie ... stuuuuuuuuuuuuupid!!!!! She plays some tragic bitchy woman who is going to be deported, so she dupes her stupid assistant into marrying her .... and it goes straight to stupidland from there. Awwwww and they finally end up being in love. Blech. Now I'll say, Betty White was cute, but it's no reason to waste your time!

It was a HOT MESS again!

Couple thoughts pop out immediately:

No Yenta Jill!!! Woot Woot!!!

And THANK GOD FOR TIVO!!! I was able to fast forward through that god awful IAMSTILLACOUNTESSDAMMIT'S recording session with that freakazoid blond mohawk guy smooching her hiney every second he could ... seriously? Was he really into it that much, or just inflating her ego to get at least a recordable song out of popeye the sailor? I also FF'd through the smooching the gay guy stuff. Seriously, Mr. gimme some sloppy sugar is lighter in the loafers than Simon!!!

Argh! money can't buy you class! argh!!!!
Ahoy there dahling!

Bethandthecity was AMAZING!!! Seriously, as duhmona would say, "kadooz" to her, "she's like white rice".

And KellyHIEEEEE ... oh my feathery god! This woman is as shallow as shallow can be. She's an unemotional unfeeling nitwit. Boy, that Bensimon must have raked her over the coals, or she agreed to give him her emotional capabilities. She hurls insults to Bethandthecity about how she's not a chef, she's a cook and then she can't back the poop coming out of her mouth UP! And then ... oy! She doesn't understand that making lemonade out of lemons is a GOOD THING! She meant "making a mountain out of a molehill", but she probably thinks a molehill has something to do with Cindy Crawford. Wow, I felt like Fangface was an incompetent arguer last week? The only thing wrong with Fangface is that her timing is screwy ... KellyHIEEEE is just plain screwy!

And den dere's Duhmona!!! Dun Dun Dunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn ... Drunk Duhmona is not a pretty Duhmona. And did you notice how she struck these stripper poses all over the boat? I have to say, I thought her swimming with a noodle was cute as pie though AHMMMMMMMMMMM gggonnnnnnnna shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooot 'er down! I'm jus gonna shhhhhhhhhhoot 'er down! CLASSIC Duhmona!!!

And ok ... folks ... how many of you agree that sexpot sonja wanted a little Kelly HIEEEEE action??? Anyone? Anyone???? And did any of you see that cod lip from her profile ... euwwwww!!!

RHWNYC ... getting more and more ridiculous!

Note tor Bravo ... why don't you just go all in and rename the show The Jill Zarin House of Fun? I'm sick of that homely yenta and her yap yap yap.

I wanted to smack Bawbee too ... I mean, it's great that he went a little caveman, defending his woman, but are you kidding me? "Jill doesn't cry" .. it's painfully obvious that Bawbee doesn't live in that blue and silved gilded thing they call a condo because Yenta Jill has been the biggest baby on that show since day one. And even then, Bawbee tells Fangface to talk to Jill and what happens? She refuses like the petulant little high school girl that she is! OMG!!!

Fangface ... ah, Fangface. Girlfriend, you have ZERO confrontation skills. ZEEEEE-ROOOOOOOOOO. She breaks out in red splotches and she goes off topic and she does it in the most inappropriate of venues with mixed company. After the confrontation with "you're a mean girl in high school" ... I mean, c'mon! Fangface, alas, is as incompetent at getting her point across is a tense social situation as she is indulgent in raising her children. You got a preview of how she's going to end up being a raving loonie when those monster boys are teenagers ... she can't handle an issue with Yenta Jill? The woman is a weak minded drama queen ... those are easy!

And Yenta Jill .. how dare she! Getting hacked at Duhmona for not telling her about Bethandthecity's Dad passing away .. what a hypocrite! She claims in front of Fangface that "well, she just doesn't know what their relationship is" and then to go postal on Duhmona and go hide in a pantry to sulk? And then there's IAMSTILLACOUNTESSDAMMIT ... oy vey, her utter fakeness and complete ignorance when it comes to potential suiters ... why does she feel the compulsion to insert herself into anything that has to do with Yenta Jill, but then, she makes it about HER!!!! I thought Fangface handled her confrontation with IAMSTILLACOUNTESSDAMMIT just fine. It's pretty crystal clear that Fangface was the stranger in this group from the get go, because they certainly want to shove her out of the group now. And know what .... it would be for the best. And oh, didn't you just love Yenta Jill's "you'll never work in this town again" BS line about how they just cannot run in the same social circles? What a stinking egomaniac little miss homely Yenta Red is! Hey Yenta Jill ... Fangface never ran in the same social circles ... Bravo inserted her into yours .... and it's an easy fix. And then ... ugh! Yenta Jill makes me want to vomit. Did you hear the chuckles when Fangface mentioned that she's in Brooklyn? What the F is wrong with these people????

Duhmona came off as the completely sane one this week!!!! Only a few eye pops and I thought she handled Yenta Jill's boo hoo brat act very well.

Heart goes out to Bethandthecity ... but she had closure.

Can't wait to see Yenta Jill try to crawl back into Bethandthecity's good graces. You all know that Bethandthecity will never EVER speak to Yenta Jill again. And B will handle it with grace, while J will get all Ginger and yap and poop everywhere letting everyone know what a horrible person Bethandthecity was to her.

Cannot WAIT for the reunion show!

Oh, KellyHIEEEEE was on this week? Was she even there? Oh yea, she was HIEEEEEE-ing all over a dog, running into a pantry and literally getting into the middle of Yenta Jill and Fangface's confrontation!

And then there's Yenta Jill being annoying as dry snot counting KellyHIEEEE's "likes" ... like like like like she's some homely schoolmarm trying to teach propah enunciation to her new "project" ... RUN AWAY KELLY!!!!

And Avery is being a bit of a little brat with regard to this whole renewing vows thing. She's not into it and Duhmona just doesn't see it.

Money Can't Buy You Class - Countess LuAnn De Lesseps - FULL SONG

Holy crap! It's sings!!!!! This song will rattle in your heads for at least a couple hours, you have been warned! Yea, money can't buy class ... it obviously didn't buy you voice lessons either!